Sunday, March 1, 2009

It's the End of My Coolness as I Know it (and I Feel Old)

Last night my husband and I went to a concert at a smallish club -- the first show I've attended in a couple of years. I've always considered myself moderately hip; most people assume I'm younger than I am and, thanks in part to an amazing local radio station, I remain a little ahead of the curve with great new music. After last night, all of my quasi-hipness faded away faster than you can say Kajagoogoo. I officially and unequivocally felt o-l-d; here's why:

* As I left for the concert, my super-cool 13-year old daughter told me, "You look, um... interesting, Mom."

* The door to the club opened at 8:00 and there were two opening bands. Most nights of the week, I am asleep before the time the first opening band hit the stage.

* Many of the people at this concert were born the year my husband and I got married.

* I've never seen so much texting in my life! You're at a concert, stop texting and pay attention to the music (or I'll ground your from that fancy-schmancy telephone that costs three times more than mine).

* My glass of wine cost $7.25! That's nearly two and a half bottles of three-buck-Chuck from Trader Joe's!

* I'm was the only one on the crowded club floor clutching a piece of stemware.

* We made our move to the coat-check during the encore so we could avoid lines and crowds.

* I found myself talking about seeing bands like The Psychedelic Furs and Echo and the Bunnymen "back in the day." Yeah, that phrase is pretty much the final nail in my Aqua Net-shellaced coffin.

I also know I'm old because I will spend this entire day recovering from my big night on the town. Perhaps I'll quickly fast-forward through this mix-tape of self-pity. Or maybe I'll just pop in some Morrissey and wallow around in it a while longer.


  1. Ah, but such wisdom, grace, fortitude and self-deprecation you have instead...

  2. A friend talked me into going to hear a punk band. I stood clutching my purse amid a crowd of mohawk, studded leather belt, chain-smoking 20 somethings. My comment to my friend, "I hate you for making me feel this old."

  3. Are you my long lost twin....?

    You just described my concert experiences for the past 10+ years. I've forgotten more great music than these young whipper-snappers will ever even hear, yet I can't stay up late enough to educate them. I fall asleep frustrated and dreaming of the early 80s. (Because the late 80s don't really count.)

  4. Yeah. Just, yeah. But we're more wiser than them kids, right? Right?...

  5. I am so so so so glad I'm not the only one who feels like a fossil!!!

  6. Rock and roll, Baby!!! Well, more like singer/songwriter, but, it was a great show. We're not old. They are all toothless puppies!!

  7. I seriously contemplated buying tickets to see Lily Allen and pray one of my twenty-something nieces would be willing to tag along. Then, I considered that I'm old enough to be most of Ms. Allen's fan base demographic's mother.
    Could someone pass me a colonic with a twist?

  8. We're going to Butch Walker next Monday night and I'm already fretting about how worthless I'll be at work on Tuesday (and I don't drink!). The late hour will KILL me.

  9. Now I am nervous :S

    Am off to see P!nk in May .. and suspect I too will be old enough to be mother to most of the audience.....

  10. Yeah well, at least strangers aren't accusing you of being your own kids granparent just yet ... unlike yours truly!

    (waves at Kosmos)


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